I can be really rubbish to myself sometimes. The only thing worse than a Monday Meltdown is the accompanying feeling that I really should have grown out of this. I should have grown out of reacting to a sudden change in my week’s plans. I should have grown out of needing to prepare carefully for … Continue reading Monday Meltdown
Tag: Diagnosis
The Token Autistic
During Lockdown Number Two (the sequel to the ever-popular Lockdown Number One) I started writing a story for my daughter. I’d write a chapter during the day whilst she was homeschooling and then later on we’d snuggle up and I’d read it to her. It was our thing and it was lovely. Then the world … Continue reading The Token Autistic
Imperfectly Autistic
Five years on from an autism diagnosis, what has changed?
Autism is a Woman-Thing
On Wednesday I put a post up about ten things autism isn’t. Today I shall add number eleven Autism isn’t just a male thing More and more women are being recognised as autistic now that we have stopped making assumptions based on sex. There are no Male or Female brains (Check out Gina Rippon's new … Continue reading Autism is a Woman-Thing
I’m not just Socially Awkward
My autism isn't just what you can see on the surface.
Leading Questions
This is something that has been bothering me lately, it has made me angry with myself for missed opportunities. It has meant that when I have reached out at times, I have fallen at the first hurdle. I'm talking about falling for Leading Questions. They deserve to be capitalised. They are repulsive things, tricksy and … Continue reading Leading Questions
Autism is the Key
My husband always says you can find me in the logic. My actions are always reasoned. There's always a clear pattern to follow. What that meant, before I knew I was autistic, was that all of my logical conclusions about who I am were deeply flawed. That I misjudged and misconstrued both my own motivations, … Continue reading Autism is the Key
Safety Nets
When I first got my diagnosis of autism, I was assured by the experts that nothing was different. I was still the same me that had walked through the door. And I agreed. When I told family about my diagnosis, I told them it didn't change anything, I was still me. And they agreed, When … Continue reading Safety Nets
Diagnosis, Rain and Tractors
Why now? What brought me to diagnosis in my thirties? It began with a random article. It was about the under-diagnosis of autistic women. I had no particular reason to read that particular article. It just sounding interesting. It was just there. As I read, a tingly feeling started in the back of my neck. … Continue reading Diagnosis, Rain and Tractors
Re-thinking things through an Autistic filter
Since being diagnosed with autism in my mid-30s, I've been re-thinking a lot of things. I've spent a lifetime of trying to appear to be the same as everyone else. I've been watching. I've been studying. Every book, article, overheard conversation, brings me that little bit closer to passing for normal. I've spent a long … Continue reading Re-thinking things through an Autistic filter
Autism and Expectations 