During Lockdown Number Two (the sequel to the ever-popular Lockdown Number One) I started writing a story for my daughter. I’d write a chapter during the day whilst she was homeschooling and then later on we’d snuggle up and I’d read it to her. It was our thing and it was lovely. Then the world … Continue reading The Token Autistic
Today is Autistic Pride day and I am contemplating what that means to me. My journey since discovering I was autistic has been one of ups and downs. I’ve had a lot of rethinking to do, a lot of processing, a ridiculous number of times exclaiming, ‘Oh that’s why I reacted like that; it was … Continue reading Autistic Pride
I’ve welcomed in an old friend this morning, and she’s happily making herself at home. At the moment she’s lying over my chest making each breath a shallow grab. I don’t like her, but instead of kicking her out, I’ve fed and watered her, and you know what happens when you feed someone; you make … Continue reading Unwelcome Guests
I am a guilty masker. I’ve always masked. It’s a complex creation with different weights and different angles. Each occasion has a different variation of it, a different material, a different pattern. I have my work mask; professional, straight-backed, walking tall. She has a specific amount of makeup and specific hair. She keeps her outlandish … Continue reading Taking or Leaving the Mask
Is my problem-solving a skill that I have because I’m autistic, or something my autism has taught me?
Trigger warning - although this post doesn’t mention any detail of abuse, it is about the dangers of teaching someone not to trust in their right to say no From a young age I was taught three things:- The messages I get from my body are wrong Not wanting to be touched is wrong That … Continue reading The Four Social Rules every Autistic Person needs to Learn
Communication is a two-way street and when it comes to autism, it's often one-way traffic. When I say that people usually assume they know what I mean. They think I mean that autistic people are disordered and can't communicate as well as non-autistic people. That's not what I mean. Communication is one-way traffic insofar as … Continue reading How I Show Love: Autism
My autism isn't just what you can see on the surface.
Why autistic people may find it hard to build relationships: the time we need to invest in each interaction is so much higher.