I didn’t grow up an optimist. I don’t think it’s my natural setting. I’m naturally a pragmatist and over-thinker, which can lead to being frozen in time. When you think of every possible permutation of what could happen, you have to think of the catastrophic too. I’m a natural risk assessor. I’m good at ranking … Continue reading Being an optimist can be hard work
Author: Rhi
Writer, poet, playwright and blogger, and as of a few years ago, diagnosed as autistic too. Just one more label to add to the multitude.
If the world were built for me
If the world were built for me there would be no start times or end times, there would just be the work that needed doing and the space in which to do it. If the world were built for me no one would ever assume poor eye contact meant low trustworthiness. If the world were … Continue reading If the world were built for me
Autistic Pride
Today is Autistic Pride day and I am contemplating what that means to me. My journey since discovering I was autistic has been one of ups and downs. I’ve had a lot of rethinking to do, a lot of processing, a ridiculous number of times exclaiming, ‘Oh that’s why I reacted like that; it was … Continue reading Autistic Pride
Autistic Art
I’ve been thinking a lot about being an autistic artist. I’ve been thinking a lot about everything. There’s been a lot to think about during Lockdown, a lot to realise and come to terms with. I’ve been thinking about being an autistic artist, and what that means, how it works for me. There can be … Continue reading Autistic Art
Autistic Joy
I remember the first time I heard the term Autism actually being applied to someone: I was seventeen, it was 1997, and I was volunteering with a local respite care team during the Summer Holidays. There was a huge group of children with various disabilities and difficulties, and I was there to... well... play with … Continue reading Autistic Joy
Lockdown Limits
I’m lucky. I’m enormously lucky. I keep telling myself this, because it’s true. In many ways my life is very similar to my normal day-to-day world, but the pattern has changed completely. I have less time to write and be creative than I normally do, the helpful social media posts about how much we can … Continue reading Lockdown Limits
When the World Changes…
One of the first things I noticed about people when I started my informal psychological studies of them as a teenager, was that angry people are often frightened people trying to regain control. Someone added me to a local Coronavirus Support Group on social media this week. At first I thought, “That sounds great - … Continue reading When the World Changes…
Preparing for Uncertainty
There’s an emergency situation going on and it’s outside of our control. There is uncertainty about what is going to happen and when, and that will be making life particularly difficult for autistic people. I’ve been feeling a low level buzz in my chest since I first realised that there was a high likelihood that … Continue reading Preparing for Uncertainty
I can’t
I’m ruminating on something small that happened this week. It was so small that I suspect it passed by unnoticed by everyone except me. It wasn’t big or important but it shone a light on my weaknesses in a way that I hadn’t been anticipating. I have far bigger challenges and far more pressing obstacles, … Continue reading I can’t
Demand Avoidance and Katherine May
I spend a lot of time trying to get one over on myself; sneaking around the back so I don’t work out what I’m up to until I’m too late. As soon as I feel like I have to do something, I run in the other direction. The worst thing about it is that the … Continue reading Demand Avoidance and Katherine May
