I’m in hiding. I don’t have time to be in hiding, it’s possibly the worst thing I could be doing at the moment, and yet hiding is where I am. I feel like I opened the floodgates because a beautiful butterfly fluttered by, and now the waters are rising and I can’t get the … Continue reading The Duck: An Autistic Play
I’m not a joiner. Even when I really want to do things, I find groups hard. There is always so much going on, so many variables, so many possible ambushes - small-talk, change, new social rules - that I feel overwhelmed before I begin. How I spend my cherished energy is important, it is a … Continue reading My head hurts and it’s a good thing
I am a sensory seeker and always have been. As a small child I was never without my comfort blanket, as I got older I was never without my scraps of “the right sort” of fabric, which I would rub between forefinger and thumb. The texture would have to be “right” and the “rightness” has … Continue reading Sensory Seeking
January swelled and fell with a clash of cymbals. I started the year with the flu. It was my own fault for waxing lyrical (I’ve never been able to work out a pattern for that particular saying, but I love the sound of it) about not getting ill at Christmas since my diagnosis. I invited … Continue reading Beginnings
In 2016 I wrote a post that seemed to capture people’s imagination in a way that others didn’t. Autscriptic has since been shared far and wide. It taught me that there is great power in sharing conversations between neurotypes: Laying bare the misunderstandings that tangle us up. The first Autscriptic was about the trials of … Continue reading Autscriptic: Mild Autism
Musings and memories of a year almost over
I don’t usually talk about my children, they have their own stories, but those stories are not mine to tell. But their beginnings in this world are my tales, so I shall tell them. I have been in labour five times. The first was in hospital, the next three were home water-births and the final … Continue reading Autism, Labour and Birth
Communicating pain when you are autistic can lead to so many miscommunications.
Is my problem-solving a skill that I have because I’m autistic, or something my autism has taught me?
Trigger warning - although this post doesn’t mention any detail of abuse, it is about the dangers of teaching someone not to trust in their right to say no From a young age I was taught three things:- The messages I get from my body are wrong Not wanting to be touched is wrong That … Continue reading The Four Social Rules every Autistic Person needs to Learn