The Four Social Rules every Autistic Person needs to Learn

Trigger warning - although this post doesn’t mention any detail of abuse, it is about the dangers of teaching someone not to trust in their right to say no From a young age I was taught three things:- The messages I get from my body are wrong Not wanting to be touched is wrong That … Continue reading The Four Social Rules every Autistic Person needs to Learn

Children and Adulting and Autisming

There is a freedom that comes with having children around. It starts with their lack of expectations. Those big, round eyes don't have an idea of who I should be, they haven't developed those advanced skills of pre-conceptions and pigeonholing. Children love it when you listen. They love it when you try to answer their … Continue reading Children and Adulting and Autisming


There are two types of mirroring, one is instant (whether conscious or not) and the other is delayed. I remember reading up on interview techniques in my early 20s (always researching). There was a chapter about the importance of body language. It talked about mirroring and how mimicking the interviewer's body language would make them … Continue reading Mirroring


Being an undiagnosed autistic has many challenges. When you compare your reactions to things with other people's, you feel like you're getting it wrong. When other people take things in their stride, and your brain feels like it's expanding inside your skull to the point you can't think, then you feel like you're overreacting. And … Continue reading Gaslighting

I don’t speak for your child

I can't speak for your child. I keep coming back to this. I can't speak for everyone. I've had a lifetime of people assuming they know what I think by my actions. Assuming that they know who I am at a glance. People still make assumptions. When I write things, those who don't want to … Continue reading I don’t speak for your child

I wanted to be good

That rule-following little girl, she really wanted to be good. She wanted to be able to eat all the food on her plate, even though the textures made her gag. She wanted to not shudder and press her ears to each shoulder in turn, every time you scraped your plate and it made that sound … Continue reading I wanted to be good